* Disclaimer *
These are my thoughts; though they may be public domain, please have enough respect and understand that they are mine and are not for the use of your own deviant agenda.
Thursday, October 30, 2003
I've survived. I've survived the fire, the smoke, the long drives, the frustration, and even losing a friendship. These last couple weeks have been pretty stressful.
Monday, October 27, 2003
I'm sitting at home, Monday morning, feeling completely immobile because the pass is all clogged up because of the fire and they are escorting people and my manager told me it was cool if I didn't come in. I called him yesterday to warn him he might need to come in an hour early because I might not be able to make it down the pass. So then this morning I wake up at 5am and check the road conditions and they say that it's intermitten passing and it would be a slow drive. I called Carlos and he said it was fine and he understood that I should take this day off just in case I got stuck down there. So I get a call this morning at 7:15 from my manager's manager and asked how I was doing, I said fine but then asked that he please tell me Carlos was there. He said no one was... I explained the situaiton and he called carlos and everything was worked out by 7:30 at least... But now I'm feeling responsible. I'm trying really hard to just accept the fact that I'm stuck up here. But I feel like I could have tried harder. But what good would it have done? Though I still feel responsible.
Well I guess I just need to take it as a forced day off and try to enjoy myself... There's nothing I can do now. So my neice is here begging me to make cookies with her. I guess I'll try to start enjoying my day off.
Friday, October 24, 2003
I took more pictures Wednesday night that I have yet to post. They are in the evening and are much more intense because you can see the fire is down by the freeway. But here it is Friday morning and the pictures I took and posted on Tuesdays entry and the ones I have yet to post seem so minor compared to the site I saw on the way to work this morning. First of all I'm at the top of the pass (Cajon Pass) and it's still dark out. I get to Cleghorn Rd, and see a glow at the top of the mountains. The fire has gotten all the way to this particular valley of the mountains and is making it's way down the one side of the valley. This part of the fire seemed contained and not out of control. Then I hit the 15/215 interchange and the traffic has slowed considerably. Once you get around the bend, past Glenn Helen you see that the sky is brown with smoke, it looks like an intense storm. My car is suddenly pushed with the force of the wind which makes me realize that this fire is not contained in any way and this wind is going to affect how long it takes them to get this fire under control. At this point I am at the straight away and haven't even reached Sierra yet, and I look to my left and see the most impacting site of the morning, a very beautiful white house had huge flames in its backyard! The scene took my breath away and after a moment realized that my mouth was dropped open! I decided at this point to say a prayer for the people that were living close to the fire, and prayed for the safety of their homes. I started tearing up just imagining what it must feel like for them. I kept driving further to be even more surprised the the flames and spread all the way to the 210 freeway and if I had the time I would have taken pictures because it was an amazing site!
Well I should get back to work. But I had to share my morning drive. ;)
Tuesday, October 21, 2003
So on my way out the door from work today I hear that there is a fire on the freeway and the pass is probably closed. So we checked the net and it looked like the freeway was clear. Luckily my mom had been down the hill so I called her and she had just made it to the top of the pass so she said it was free and clear, so I jammed! I wanted to make sure to get up the hill if they did decide to close it for any reason.
And as I drove I suddenly remembered that I had my camera on me. So I took it out and (don't tell my highschool driving instructor) I snapped a couple of these on the road.
*I didn't endanger anyone in the collection of these photos!* ;)
Monday, October 20, 2003
So today on my way to work, as I'm hitting the 15/215 interchange I am abruptly stuck in stop and go traffic... Looking to see ahead around the bend things mellowed out so I tried to wait patiently for whatever it was to break up so I could get to work. I then saw a surprising site, an 8 car pile up! Nothing life threatening, but each were interlocked to the others bumper. I tried to figure out what could have happened to have that take place. And as I contemplated this on the right there were two cars, a big rig and a small 2 seater, and of course the big rig was fine. And then a little futher up I saw yet ANOTHER 3 car pile up, involving 2 cars and a big rig. What a horrible way to start the week!!!! I was just thankful that I was running late or I could have been involved in that accident. Could you imagine?
Well today is a new day and a new week. I really do feel that God is working on my heart. I feel stronger and more willing to do His will and not my own. It was an extremely relaxing weekend and I'm very thankful for that! I am reading two books now, A Purpose Driven Life and The Power of a Praying Wife. You may wonder why I'm reading a book for a married woman when I'm not even married. I figured it couldn't hurt to start praying for my future mate. Whether he be in my life right now or not. Either way it doesn't hurt. :)
Thursday, October 09, 2003
"This world is fading away, along with everything it craves." 1 John 2:17
Sounds like a beautiful line from a poem doesn't it?
Saturday, October 04, 2003
I have purchased a new cell phone. Nothing with bells and whistles but I sure was tempted on spending $200 on a cell phone. I decided to stick to a cheap $99 phone, which sadly is 10x better then the one I had just lost. But I still haven't decided whether or not I'm going to go back and exchange this one for the original one I wanted but isn't going to be in till Tuesday, it's exactly the same phone but has a color screen and allows for slightly more bells and whistles. ;) It's only $30 more but I still haven't decided if I need it. I mean considering what I was using my new cell is great as is, why do I need more? The battery alone is worth the buy! My old cell phone would die after a few minutes being on a call. This one should last me a day or two without a charge at least! Either way, like I said before the only huge bummer is that all my phone numbers are GONE! Oh well I guess sometimes it's good to start from a new beginning, ya know?
Well my brother is FINALLY doing better! It's sooo much nicer to see him out of the hospital and actually eating. I'm just thankful that his infection in his eye has gone down. His face looks like it has more color. He genuinely seems to be in better spirits! Thank God for that! That took a lot of my time, when he spent almost two weeks in the hospital at the Kaiser in Fontana. I went there almost every day after work, stayed until I couldn't stay any longer and went home and got to bed and woke up for work and went by again after work. It was a stressful time. I think Brian was pretty afraid for his health. In the end he had 5 units of blood put into his system. He finally is able to lower his dosage of prednizone(?sp) and his arthritis in his knees have settled down a bit, and like I said his eye infection is almost gone. I just talked to an old friend Collette the other day after work and she told me she just experienced the same thing. She was in the hospital for 3 weeks, and she also has ulcerated colitis! She told me of alternate medicine that could be taken. I think it's totally God that I talked to her. I haven't talked to her in easily over two years and she just got out of the hospital for hers! Crazy, but I do believe it's God. I need to contact her again and make sure she sends me that information for my brother.
So work is going um... ok. I had a breakdown Thursday. I couldn't handle it after I had just had a rough morning and had a customer tell me that I probably couldn't get something done about an issue in the company because I was just a peon but he was glad to set me straight. I'm not kidding this guy was a complete JERK! I went outside and wanted to keep walking. I finally calmed down and decided that I needed to talk to my upper management. I decided to ask when I could set up a time, he said right then but I knew I was too emotional to talk right then, but he wanted to anyways. So there I was, laying it all down, crying and everything. Yup... it was pathetic. But he amazingly understood everything and agreed with most of it. But I felt better, and he made me smile again. I think it just helped having someone understand, especially when he didn't even realize the stress and pressure the tech department is under. I don't think anything will happen right away, but his acknowledgement will help get something done, maybe. :) Either way I felt a new sense of strength when I went back to work, and even the next day the stress and business didn't get to me.
My brother Shawn came into town last weekend and it was great to see him. I haven't had too many opportunities to hang out, and sadly I didn't get much time with him this time. Except on Sunday after he spoke at church. I went up for prayer and just asking for a closer relationship with God, and he prayed for me and felt that I needed to go out and get a passport. I started the process. :) I have my birth certificate, but found out that getting a passport is not that easy. I found that for my area the only time they give out passports is by appointment only m-f 10-2 which is directly in the middle of my shift. So I am going to research places closer to my work so I can go on my lunch break. :) So we'll see. Maybe God is calling me to go into another country? I'm not sure. But I'm going to be obedient, maybe that's all it's meant to be, an act of faith and obedience.
Speaking of going to another country, my manager went to Ireland for his honeymoon and oh my goodness! Breathtaking! I know Ireland is a place that I will want to see someday.
The other day I was driving and am bummed that I missed the opportunity to take a picture of something that is not normal for me. It was a picture of urban city life that's for sure! ;) I saw something beautiful in construction for some reason. I was in a line of traffic and happened to look at my side mirror and I was at an angle that saw the line of cars behind me at a 45 degree angle and then in the background of my mirror which would be to the left of my car you saw the dividing barriers with metal rods sticking through them and then a line of traffic coming from the other side with orange constructions signs everywhere, with the orange poles blocking an open trench. It's hard to explain and sounds like every other construction site but the angling of everything would have been really cool.
Oh well I've written a novel and think I should probably go play with some of my pictures now so that I can post them and let you guys see how much fun it's been for me to have my very own camera!! :)
So I'm sitting here on hold with Sprint PCS waiting to report my cell lost or stolen. This sucks! All my phone numbers and everything GONE! :( The sadly ironic thing is that I was going to purchase a new cell with my next check. This is two weeks early but oh well. I have needed a new phone for a LONG time and I guess this just makes me *have
* to get one. It'll be nice but I'm just not sure if I have the money to do this right now. But I guess I don't have a choice now do I? :)
Well last night I went to Knott's Scary Farm! Gosh I love that place! And for some odd reason I must have had a huge sign over my head of "SCARE ME and not the other people I'm with!" Cause they picked on me the whole time. I mean it makes it fun, but I remember last year when I went I felt kinda bored cause no one was going after me. I remember the best scare of the night, I was walking in a maze and in front of my group of friends. I had stopped the line to fix my shoe string and I was stopped right before a corner... So when I turned the corner they jumped out at my feet, and then I was still laughing at that when someone dressed the same as the wall decorations came scurrying out like a spider and I litterally stumbled backward. :) It was great! hehehe
Well I found out information on cell phones, I need go shopping now. I will try to keep updating cause there has been a lot going on in my life the last few days/weeks.