My Observations

* Disclaimer *

These are my thoughts; though they may be public domain, please have enough respect and understand that they are mine and are not for the use of your own deviant agenda.

Monday, August 29, 2005

What Icons are for you?(Thank you for #1!! Please check out my other Memes!!) by ladyallie
Favourite Colour
Your Love icon is...
Your Sad Icon is...
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Your Sexy Icon is...
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Saturday, August 27, 2005

So finally a moment I can spare to update the blog!

God is doing some amazing things for me. My whole attitude towards life has changed. I no longer feel disheartened or hopeless (as I have in some incidents). There is so much going on in my family and church on top of my personal struggles that I'm surprised I'm as upbeat as I am these days. Most things I'm not at liberty to discuss in public as the outcomes have not been made apparent to a multitude of situations. I am still amazed at how calm I am at everything. But it's like I know the most plausible outcomes and have settled them in my mind, whether I'm happy with them or not.

Yet in all the struggle I have had a lot of blessings. I can imagine that God has done that to soften the blow of the trials. ;) I'm not sure though. I have found that since the company has gotten out of Chapter 11 we are receiving a check of our vacation time that was cut off the day we went in. Of course none of us were told this information when it happened so I still owe hours back to the company that I took off after we filed for Chapter 11 and I had no hours to use. But oh well. It wasn't like I was planning on going on vacation anyways, I had already had a heads up when this happened.

But what I didn't know and just found out yesterday is how much the check is that I'm getting back! Talk about a blessing! I will be able to pay off some credit card debt... a huge chunk of it! I will either pay off the lower one all together and put the rest towards my ex's debt, or I will put it all on my ex's debt and have less to go on it... I'd prefer to pay off mine and then the amount I pay on it monthly will go to my ex's and it could be paid off by the end of the year! I'm sooo excited! I will be pretty much debt free! How awesome would that be!? Then from Jan - Jul of 2006 I can put the money I put towards debt to savings for a down payment on a new car! :-D I mean I need a new car by July anyways... so this works out great! I was worried about saving the downpayment and now I won't have to. Though I think some of the check will go towards savings and every month just like tithe, well maybe 5% of my check will go towards savings each time. It still sucks that I have had to pay for my ex's debt, but in the end I'm sure there will be a blessing and there was definitely a lesson learned!

Well it's 9:00 am and I need to get ready for the day. I'm taking my sister out to lunch and to the movies. With everything going on in her life I really need to support her and be there with her. I hope and pray it's a nice break away from her life.

Friday, August 19, 2005

Oh where to begin!? I guess chronological is always best.

Jury Duty - I actually was scheduled for Jury Duty. It turns out it was for a grand jury on a murder case! I was totally intrigued and would have loved to have served on the jury but in the end the court said it would be an 8 week trial and if employers don't pay for jury duty that they would consider it undo hardship and excuse us for this particular trial. I sat there totally wishing I could be apart of it. I would be sooo interested to see the process of a murder trial. It happened back in 1992 and there were four counts. 1. Kidnapping 2. Rape with the intent on fulfilling sexual lust. 3. Murder in the first degree. 4. something to do with taking a minor girl under the age of 14 against her will (don't exactly know how it was different then kidnapping but oh well). The entire court building knew it was a big trial because when I was in the elevator leaving they were talking about how crowded the building was and mentioned that it was the draw of 75 people for the large case and then turned to me and asked if I was apart of it. If I got paid for jury duty I would have totally wanted to be on that trial. Talk about an interesting first jury duty to ever follow through with. hehe

Flat Tire - so on my way back from the courthouse to the office I noticed my tire on the right front side was low. So I went to a gas station to fill it up. I went to the office because I got done so early with jury duty. By the time I left work at 6 I noticed the tire was low again. I asked sam if he thought I should fill it up again and he said I should at least make it home. Well I made it home. I changed to go to the gym and got in my car and drove maybe two feet when I realized something was wrong with my tire. I went around the car and saw... flat... :( So I go in sit in my dads office and he asks what's up. I tell him and he was sweet enough to change it to my doughnut. I drove to America's Tire since I had my warrenty through them. It was 7:45 and they were closed. I called my dad to see if I could use his car and he said he was going into work so I would be able to go with him but not hang out afterwards. So I realized I could still take it to walmart. I called them and started over there. I get no where. They won't accept me because they are closing in 10 min and have three cars ahead of me. :( So I go to kraegan (?sp) and get cans of fix-a-flat and Sam calls me and I explain the flat tire and he requests that I don't use the cans of fix-a-flat if I can absolutely help it. So as I drove home Sam tells me that his cat Ricer has to have 2 inches of his tail cut off because of the infection that happened while I was housesitting. Needless to say I was a bit overwhelmed with everything else and started crying. I felt responsible but Sam actually started the conversation with a disclaimer that it wasn't my fault just because I was watching the house when it happened. I knew it wasn't just the fact that Ricer was going to have surgery. It was the entire night. Everything overwhelmed me. The outcome was that my mom was going to drive my car with the doughnut on it around town and I would take her car in the morning...

CleanUp Day at linkLINE Communications - So today was a cleanup day at linkline. Everyone was supposed to be there so we could get the job done. Every employee. I got up a little later then normal since I didn't have to ride with my dad. But at 6:30 I got a knock on my door to find out that my doughnut had a flat!!! Geez was it ever going to end?! So I had to ride with my dad. Sam had offered to drive me home or lend me his car so I could hang out with the gang this evening. So that was the plan. I get to work and order the pizza. Steve wanted it earlier then normal so we could get busy with the cleaning by noon... So I had the pizza there by 11:30 and everyone was chowing down. Frank mentions that we're going to have a little fun cleaning and we were to pick a hat out of the bag. They were black or white hats. I immediately went for the black. hehe I knew we were going to be teams of some sort but to clean!? This was weird. So then we get handed a piece of paper to sign as a disclaimer. I'm sitting there wondering what kind of cleaning we were going to be doing and then regretted wearing sandles.

Then as I read the disclaimer I saw the word paintball... I read more and walked back to the group and heard Frank say ok I lied... We're all going to play PAINTBALL!!!! I was scared, excited and confused all at the same time! So after the reality set it that the entire office was going to go play paintball ... against eachother... on the clock... I was totally jazzed! They bought matching shirts for the teams even. So I realized that even more so sandles were not going to cut it. I asked Sam if there was a way for us to stop off somewhere quick since I need shoes. Luckily david needed some too. So we decided a cheap stop to Target would get us just what we needed for the day. I bought a basic pair of mens workout shoes (figuring if they were comfortable enough I could use them for the gym since my old shoes are just not cutting it). We all got there and set up with our equipment and goggles. I was nervous since I've never played. So we get on the field and I'm protecting our flag. Luckily David, Sam and Doug were on my team so I knew I would have a good fighting team. So I stayed back... Then I noticed they were advancing and someone was getting around the right. So I shot them out and there was someone behind him. He was focusing on me so my dad goes to the left (yes my dad played paintball!) and as I continue to shoot he comes around and snags the guy. I notice more are hit and my team is dying. I go forward until I realize I have one more opposite team member on the field. He and I have a shootout and I actually won and captured the flag for my team!!! :-D I could even hear the guys chanting for me. It felt great. I mean being Ronda and I were the only two girls and we were on opposite teams. And it just felt good to know I had done a good job. The guys were impressed. hehe :) That's hard to do at times.

So the next couple games I watched to flag and stayed back. My team was the winning team in the end of the day. I only got hit twice. Once in the leg but it didn't break and once in the neck.. Oh man that was painful! My eyes immediately started filling up with tears... Poor Carlos felt so bad. He was aiming for the body and knew it had to have hurt. hehe But I told him it was ok and a definitely good shot... I gave him crap later though. Milked it for all it was worth. hehe So the middle games were more boring. I ended up getting back into the fun on the last game by taking out the last 3 people of the opposite team while they focused on the professional shooters. hehe It was great! I was sooo impressed that the management was actually able to keep the secret! And it was such an awesome time. All the way back to town David, Sam and I were talking a million miles an hour about our experiences and how much fun we had with this and that.

Well I'm at Sam's and they are ready to put in a movie so I need to get going.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

So I'm horrible when it comes to remembering jury duty. So much so that this last one I got I had to keep reminding myself about so I don't get into too much trouble for forgetting my last summons. Sure enough I luckily remembered this morning that I still have jury duty. I searched out the paperwork and found that it's on 8/18/05! Phew! Haven't missed it... So I put it on top of everything on my desk completely visable and continually reminding myself that wednesday night I have to call. So tonight I get off work and look at the number to call and notice its in the 909 area code. And wondered... well that's odd... normally its just the local court number. So I looked more closely.... It's in San Bernardino!!! It's a countywide summons! They require to summon jurors from all areas of the county. I cannot transfer to another location! Dang! That sucks! Not only have I always gotten out of jury duty (meaning have NEVER once had to attend!), I have never once been required to go to the San bernardino court! So now my first ever jury duty gets to be for what I can only gather to be a high profile case. I am sure I can get out of it considering linkLine doesn't pay me for jury duty and I can claim financial hardship, but it'll be interesting non-the-less and well... maybe a bit intimidating too...

So today linkLINE was approved by the courts to get out of Chapter 11. So yes I'm happy for the company. But it still means a lot of hard work to get the company up to par again.

I have youthgroup tonight. Looking forward to hanging out with the boys. God has been doing a lot in my heart over the last few weeks. I would say the bulk of it took place in the last couple days. Well the bulk of my acting on what I've been hearing from God I should say. I am glad I have not taken anything else onto my evening schedule but youthgroup. That frees the rest of my week for devoting to my own personal self improvement, whether it's physical, mental or spiritual.

I went to the gym for the first time in forever last night. It felt great! I had a rough day yesterday at work and was struggling with some emotions. I decided to talk a walk with Sam and even though it wasn't a fast paced walk, I noticed when I got back to the office my whole attitude changed. That's when I realized how much of a stress relief going to the gym can be. And as much as I know going to the gym to lose weight is a good thing, for me that part can be discouraging since it takes so long to see results. The last time I was habitual about going to the gym it was for stress relief and well I was in the best shape I've ever been. So hopefully it can get back to that point of being habitual again. I plan on going Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. We'll see if any other days get added.

It's nice to know I have more time for myself in the evenings. I've noticed I'm keeping my room cleaner and more organized. I have more time to update my blog now. I still have pictures from past events that I need to update ... sheesh... hehe Well I must go for now.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

I just stood through the most amazing storm I've EVER witnessed!!! It was incredible! The power and intimidation of it! It was thundering and lightning. The thunder was so powerful that its rumble would set alarms off, not just car alarms either… Just down our street the schools alarm went off too! The wind was acting so peculiar! It would be windy then die down then gusts of wind would come through then rain just poured out like a faucet! Immediately (literally within a few seconds) the streets were flooding. Full garbage cans were being washed down the street. The roof was a waterfall to look through! It was the most intimidating storm I've ever been through. I was actually afraid to step out of the protection of our house though I desperately wanted to look straight up in it! As my dad and I stood there marveling at its power and beauty suddenly the entire sky was lit up like it was daylight, within that second the largest crack of thunder hit my ears, then everything went black… we had lost power. It was unnerving but still we stood there watching expectantly. The lights came back and suddenly the wind shifted directions. I felt cold pieces at my feet and noticed hail! The rain came down so strong that it looked like fog. My dad and I wondered how the wind could fluctuate direction so quickly without it possibly being a tornado (even if it was high above us, we came to the conclusion that it could still have happened). Even as I write this the lights are flickering. I don’t expect to be on the computer long. But I’m in awe! Anyways, we moved to the backyard to get a view of where the storm was going. We saw lightning strike then the entire sky would turn green. Our guess… transformers… Someone else went without power. I moved into my room and just enjoyed the amazing storm.

Sam had called in the middle of all this. I called him back and explained the entire thing. He was so jealous! But I don’t feel too bad for him. He got to experience some thunder storms in Rhinelander this last week. Hehe

So I’m sitting here just marveling at the power in nature, I just felt the need to share.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

So here I am again, at Sam's place, housesitting while he is in Rhinelander, Wisconsin visiting friends. So far I've been REALLY enjoying his place. More so then the other times I have been here. I can't really say why that is. But I guess it doesn't really matter now does it?

I feel a new era/chapter of my life is about to begin. Things are going to change drastically for me in about a month. I have been doing a lot of retrospective thinking. Realizing things that I need to change. Realizing things I want to change and are willing to make the time for them as well. I sometimes wonder if a major life change causes me to jump into action when I've become stagnant? I'm excited by the possibilities. I'm curious about my future and where it will take me. I see another's future being taken in such a unique route so quickly and smoothly that it gives me hope for how drastic my own life can change. There are some major things taking place. Things that cause pondering about the direction of ones life. I know the youthgroup is a pretty significant change in my life that could take it in a direction I wasn't expecting. Now I guess I just take it and go along for the ride.

But for now I'm tired... I'm gonna go to sleep early tonight... cause I can.. hehe


Monday, August 08, 2005

You are pure, moral, and adaptable.
You tend to blend into your surroundings.
Shy on the outside, you're outspoken to your friends.

You believe that you live a virtuous life...
And you tend to judge others with a harsh eye.
As a result, people tend to crave your approval.

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Man it's been a hectic day! I got up early so I could drive down to work with my dad. Got my coffee and muffin for breakfast and noticed a more bitter taste in my coffee then usual. So I didn't finish it. I get to work and feel fairly productive till about 11 when my stomach started growling so bad I had to get something to eat. I noticed my mood was a bit short by this point. My dad and I went to lunch together. Sam and the guys were going to the shooting range and as much as I love going with them I couldn't afford that long of a lunch (it usually ends up being a couple hours). So I asked my dad if he wanted company. I could tell he was happy I was going with him. But he was definitely cantankerous! My goodness. We were both nice enough to each other but had a bit of a bite in our comebacks. hehe

I get back from lunch and am working along and suddenly at 3pm my mind decides to stop! I am not able to focus on anything. Not even stuff I would like to focus on rather then work. I became very zoned. I did the best I could with the last couple hours of work. I go home with my dad and he's trying to continue on his upbeat thought process. Apparently he has been fighting to stay positive today so he was just talking positively until he became positive. I on the other hand started to get a headache. I found that in his excitement his voice would raise up and I was trying soo hard to be nice but tell him that the headache wasn't taking kindly to his loudness. He understood. He tried. I couldn't fault him for that... But it would eventually get right back up there.

By the time I got home the headache was intense. It wasn't just a headache it was now turning into depression. I was just REALLY down all of the sudden. I didn't know how to feel about anything. Nothing was upsetting me, but yet I couldn't get myself out of the funk. My dad was trying so hard. I just got some peace and quiet for about 10 minutes. I messaged Sam and told him I could use a friendly voice, so he and I talked a few more moments before I had to head to youthgroup. I took 4 ibuprofin's and headed out the door for youthgroup. Praying the whole time that I would get out of this funk before I got to youthgroup.

I drive up and make a conscious effort that I'm not going to be negative and that I'm going to be upbeat. It must have helped cause before I knew it I was really enjoying myself. We talked about how we were going to do a going away party for Rachel and Tom since they are now focusing their efforts on worship and not the youth. We also talked about another project we're having them work on to get to know different individuals in the church better. And then I spoke a little on being gracious to people around us. Today I found that I have really struggled with being gracious to people. I'm too critical. People get on my nerves too quickly... or too many people get on my nerves I guess. I guess my dad has noticed this and today just made a quick comment about usually it's the person being annoyed that has the problem. I don't think he intended it to hit home as much as it did. It was a passing comment. I started asking him how this could be when I expressed my annoyances and how ANYONE would get annoyed with the people like that. He kept bringing it back to having grace for one another. I really thought hard about it all day. And it was a good topic for discussion since I was convicted for the last two weeks on the subject. So we had a discussion about that. Then I asked to play African Uno! We played that over an hour. We had a good time. Lots of laughs. I actually noticed a few times in the night how different my attitude had become.

So all-in-all it's been a great day. I left youth and drove home and gave the parents an update. I talked to my mom a little about my plans for my candle party this weekend. I am housesitting for Sam so Friday night I'll be down the hill but I'll come home Saturday morning to help clean the house and prepare for the party. I'm not sure who all will be able to make it. A lot of my friends are going to be out of town. Anyways, it's my bedtime. I need sleep. I have another early morning ahead of me.


Monday, August 01, 2005

So today has been a productive day. Actually this whole weekend has. This is night and day difference from my week last week. I found that my first two days were a waste of time and I never caught up.

Friday I went to a grownup ladies slumber party! hehe It was A LOT of fun! We all hung out and ate and then after giving ourselves enough time for our food to settle we all jumped in the pool! Michelle, the hostess, has a REALLY large pool! So we enjoyed that for a couple hours. I haven't been swimming since a year or so ago at Sam's apartment complex. It was awesome! We played Pictionary after the ladies that weren't sleeping over went home. I was a wuss. I only stayed up till 1am and even before that found myself snoring on the couch. hehe

Saturday I finally woke up at 10:30am! I didn't sleep too well but I'm shocked I woke up that late! I hung out for about an hour and then headed back home to shower and get ready for my friend Brandie to come over. We were going to spend the evening working on her husband's bands site. We worked from 2:00 - 9:30pm with a two hour break for dinner at Chili's. It was tiring getting back into making a website... but here is the final product... I'm pretty happy with it. But I think the hosting site doesn't have a lot of bandwidth or something because it uploads fairly slow and it's not a lot of graphics... So after I took her home I got back home and slept.

Sunday I got to church. It was my last sunday to do hospitality (thank goodness... I'm broke!). Next time I offer I don't think I'll buy dougnuts for everyone at the church. That gets expensive! :) So after church I stuck my nose into the final quarter of Harry Potter and when I finished it I was left kind of dissapointed with this book compared to the others. I won't say it was bad, there were definite plot twists... but comparatively speaking this one left me dissapointed. But I am still looking forward to the next book. I finished early enough to watch a chick flick with my mom (Someone Like You).

Today has been a fairly productive day at work too. Now I'm off to a meeting with someone about a website. Maybe I'll be able to bring in a little extra cash. We'll have to wait and see.